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Messages - Alf Hart

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Yorkshire 3 / Re: Week 10 results
« on: November 06, 2022, 11:08:04 AM »
morning GMan

picked your message up yesterday but never made it down .. met a mate at Winter seam from NZ who is part of the ladies world cup coaching squad .. long story short .. i’ve got a terrible hangover .

Regional Two (North & North East) / Re: Week 9
« on: November 06, 2022, 11:05:22 AM »


marvellous response .. should i catch one of your games an obligatory pint from me ..

Yorkshire 3 / Re: Week 10 fixtures
« on: November 05, 2022, 06:22:02 AM »

not sure what you’re talking about there dear boy .. it’s all hype by them knottingley posh boys .. be more like two pink poodles sniffing amongst the rhododendrons .. there’s never any aggression when they play each other . .. and .. factually …nottla have a better clubhouse and pitch than Whitwood .. which is a shed on a floodplain on a busy road in the shadow of digger land… nowhere near castleford ..the view over the marsh and canal is way prettier at nottla as well .. oh and the beer is better … the blokes are more fun … and oh i don’t know .. beachy has nicer hair and underpants .. nottla and Bess’s boys by ten . … my game today after lunch in xscape .

Regional Two (North & North East) / Re: Week 9
« on: November 05, 2022, 06:12:15 AM »
not much to disagree with there gidders … wouldn’t bet against Crocs with their tame gorilla back in the swing of things ..never been to droners but sounds like they’re cheating gits same as the hipperholme climbing club with an unpleasant inclination .

apparently in answer to an earlier question Nobbernoble is at the rugby league world cup commentating the reason for his absence at Bees .

Regional Two (North & North East) / Re: Run in with Hells Angels
« on: November 02, 2022, 12:50:12 PM »
little tinker BrrB

I know I come from a strange background with a mantra of believing zero that I’m told.. and verify everything that I observe..if  a sentence begins with ‘I’m told ‘ listeners switch on pisstakealert .

sooo .. is there a club in Yorkshire run by my old prep school headmaster Bugarem Allot .. who has the power to send people ‘home’ from our free democratic haven ?

Is our county infested with biker gangs carrying a threat to our well-being ?? .. not noticed them if I’m honest … have the mods merged with satans slaves? …yeah right bit like moortown merging with ..oh I don’t know… bramley … ( ugh imagine that they’d call it Moorley))

people to be avoided ?? …definitely not middle aged sting wannabes skidding about uncontrollably on hairdryers fitted with casters and with all of primarks mirror display glued to em ..

here’s a cryptic clue for you …  boll what loads a of ocks… five letters.

Regional Two (North & North East) / Re: Week 8
« on: October 30, 2022, 07:14:21 AM »
gamesmanship surely not

Selby getting steamrollered cartoon style , hometeam score a pushover try … within minutes a prop walks off shouting to the bench ‘it’s a head injury’ .. no cunning plans to be seen here sirs .

Regional Two (North & North East) / Re: Floodlight regulations
« on: October 30, 2022, 07:09:16 AM »
proper prop

best answer in weeks .. i’ve a whole range of questions .. i’ll keep close to my chest until i fall in your orbit 👍

PS convert .. thanks for the offer … i’ll fetch the obvious if you bring the onions .

Regional Two (North & North East) / Re: Week 8
« on: October 29, 2022, 05:49:36 PM »
Pont w 24-3 with 14 most of game i’m told .

Regional Two (North & North East) / Re: Floodlight regulations
« on: October 29, 2022, 05:48:26 PM »
so i’m bang on the money then .. generic commend lacking knowledge about who does  what at the club you claim to support ..and for your info i also know the background and antecedents of all your home grown players currently in the 1st xv .

yep it’s all nonsense because it’s a forum not a courtroom .

Regional Two (North & North East) / Re: Floodlight regulations
« on: October 29, 2022, 07:25:48 AM »

you’ve picked up wrong ball .. the point i’m making is in relation to previous posts about generating bar income … read the thread .. or are you one of the blokes giving opinions in the clubhouse without knowledge of facts .? I know why Ponty have the lights . ..I also know about the successful junior section..the names of the coaches, players, parents and their dogs  .. do you ?

Regional Two (North & North East) / Re: week 8 predictions
« on: October 28, 2022, 04:43:32 PM »
well Benners

take you as a decent honourable sort .. so .. still town ( secret admirer of town even with mammary mons as your biggest member )

Regional Two (North & North East) / Re: week 8 predictions
« on: October 28, 2022, 02:46:40 PM »
town by a ton

droners to pip  Morley

Kk crunches  mud crabs

Punch and judy surely  win easy against Nobbys nomads

Scabs by a few against mountain men in unnatural terrain for them

Ponty  win against Selby at home .. last seasons result irrelevant when Selby had gone on leave collectively .

Regional Two (North & North East) / Re: Floodlight regulations
« on: October 27, 2022, 08:01:30 AM »
I’m informed

Ponty have over last Summer installed RFU standard lights to their second pitch at a cost of 50k ( their main pitch is already up to spec) … that is a lot of money to recover over the bar especially as it costs a billionty quid to flick the switches .  as for Lux Levels the cartoon villain .. every ref needs one .. plus a tosspot detector to root out that gobby sod in the crowd shouting spiteful drivel .  a hard groundometer for assessing frost ..wind meter so Calderdale clubs can’t cancel fixtures in N Yorks .. that could also be useful to root out the old farts . …surely it’s pretty obvious to normal persons if floodlights aren’t fit to play under ??  As for Sandal  fetching half of Wakefield …hilarious .. it’s several miles outside the city .. it’s as close to Wakey as The old agricultural Hamlet of Moortown is to Leeds . 

Regional Two (North & North East) / Re: Floodlight regulations
« on: October 26, 2022, 11:48:04 AM »

Not the lights that’s Sandals issue … clearly you haven’t seen the state of the main pitch … worst I think i’ve ever seen at this stage of season ..with rain it will look like Brids harbour … it’s a proper mess .

Yorkshire 3 / Re: Week 8 Results
« on: October 26, 2022, 07:52:43 AM »
well me old Been

nottla have a genuine clubman as coach with a tight bunch of local lads on the field working hard for each other .. apart from Beachers obvs .. he’s a ponce .

As for Hemsworth .. you would have to have a poor carry on to want to move to low fields road .. Hemsworth is the Rsend of nowhere … it’s a depressing village in a sea of seething apathy . ( i can say that as I was burn there before anyone gets self righteous on me )

Nottla for champs 💪

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