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Offline Locked Out

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Week 2 Predictions/Banter
« on: September 09, 2021, 07:55:58 PM »
It's been a while and what with so much chat on Y2 it's been so difficult to keep up.

Outcomes from last week's predictions based on the following results:

Hullensians P v P Leeds Corinthians
Keighley 21 - 16 Baildon
Northallerton 53 - 29 North Ribblesdale
Ripon 12 - 5 Thornensians
Wath Upon Dearne 20 - 3 Yarnbury
Wensleydale 3 - 40 Wetherby
Wheatley Hills 37 - 22 Old Grovians

As we hadn't actually agreed a scoring mechanism for predictions and there are so few of us I propose the following: Each week we predict the winner plus or minus 7 points = 7 counts as minus and the exact score for one game only. So:

Exact score = 3 points
Correct points difference = 2 points
Correct result = 1 point
Good banter attached = 1 bonus point (at my discretion)

From last week, as Flaggy was the only one to mention scores, we should start at the same level:

Flaggy 5
Dr Ruck 5
Locked 5

Any newcomers can start at 5 points per week missed from then onwards.

This week's fixtures and my predictions/banter to follow tomorrow

Baildon v Northallerton
Leeds Corinthians v Wensleydale
North Ribblesdale v Old Grovians
Thornensians v Wheatley Hills
Wetherby v Wath Upon Dearne
Yarnbury v Ripon
Keighley v Hullensians

Good luck chaps.
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Offline RugbyKing

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Re: Week 2 Predictions/Banter
« Reply #1 on: September 09, 2021, 09:32:47 PM »
Northallerton -7
Leeds c +7
North Ribb -7
Thorne +7
Wetherby +7
Ripon -7
Keighley-7

Offline ABR

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Re: Week 2 Predictions/Banter
« Reply #2 on: September 09, 2021, 09:46:49 PM »

Baildon +7
Leeds Corinthians -7
Old Grovians -7
Wheatley Hills +7
Wetherby +7
Ripon +7
Keighley +7

Offline Locked Out

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Re: Week 2 Predictions/Banter
« Reply #3 on: September 10, 2021, 12:00:37 PM »
Northallerton +7
Leeds Corinthians -7
North Ribblesdale 21 - 13 Old Grovians
Thornensians -7
Wetherby +7
Ripon +7
Keighley -7

And now for the banter:

Mount Doom v County Set - Got to go with North’s strong away record from last season, though Baildon could make a showing after holding Keefly to a decent score.

Ancient monuments v Cheesey whotsits - Not sure if ‘Dale can bounce back after last week’s drubbing, but going with home strength for Leeds for the time being.

Sheep sha**ers v Poo boys - No excrement on the pitch to use as a secret weapon here, so Ribb to press on with Wharfedale leftovers.

Bog trotters v Wheatos - First scrum measuring 6 on the Richter scale and some big bangs going on thereafter. A close run slug fest with Thorne by a small margin.

Slimmers world v Pie men - more high velocity and earth shattering collisions here, with Wetherby the more finessed side.

Yawno v Farmers - Better be careful what I say here, but the magic carpet will suit Ripon’s kids to a tee. Just hope their attention stays in the pitch and not on the play park.

Airedale terriers v Fisherman’s friends - a happy reunion for the ex Y1 outfits, both keen to get back to where they think they should be. Tight home win.

Good luck everyone.
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Offline Ribb Exile in Lancs

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Re: Week 2 Predictions/Banter
« Reply #4 on: September 10, 2021, 06:26:53 PM »
Baildon v Northallerton Northallerton +7 (3-21)
Leeds Corinthians v Wensleydale Wensleydale -7 (12-17)
North Ribblesdale v Old Grovians Ribblesdale +7 (25-11)
Thornensians v Wheatley Hills Thorne -7 (12-6)
Wetherby v Wath Upon Dearne Wetherby +7 (32-3)
Yarnbury v Ripon Ripon -7 (12-18)
Keighley v Hullensians Keighley +7 (39--6)
I am assuming we need to predict scores as well as results.
« Last Edit: September 10, 2021, 06:51:46 PM by Ribb Exile in Lancs »

Offline Weirdowetwipe

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Re: Week 2 Predictions/Banter
« Reply #5 on: September 10, 2021, 07:52:52 PM »
Hi Guys, I'm new to this league so don't know much about the teams, so my predictions are gonna be a stab in the dark, based on hear say from my charva contacts in and around Yorkshire.

It's been a long old break with this pandemic, had some major bust ups with Luciana as I had to actually get to know her and had no choice but to hooker her whilst in lockdown! Anyway enough about my personal life and my Venezuelan beauty queen, onto the predictions for this week!

Baildon to win:
Sheffield have got the BBC Business Blades Crew.
Bradford have got the BBC Bad Boy Chiller Crew.
Baildon taking after there Bradford idols have got th BBBBC Bad Boy Baildon Ball Crushers. Northallerton are gonna face a hostile crowd all turning up in their big 450s, big goose parka, all-black clava. Fans on the sideline are gonna be doing wheelies, everyone the referee gives a decision against Baildon invisible guns are gonna be waved in the air as they pop it and twist it. Northallerton All saints parish church choir boys are gonna have to play Red light risk it rugby if they want to have any chance of coming for the lot, coming for the jackpot. However I fear for the choir boys, I think they'll freeze like they did in the parish church whilst singing O come all ye faithful for the first time in front of their parents. Will be a long day at the office for the choir boys and Baildon should pop it and twist it quite easily!

Leeds Corinthians to win.
I took a little smooch down to Leeds after lockdown and noticed a lot of the boys had been badly affected by lockdown and had turned to ladies Rounders for inspiration after losing their appetite for Rugby. Instead of smashing the bags, they were holding 9 inch wooden batons in their hand smashing balls around the ground and cupping balls as they tried to take diving catches. It was quite a sorry state of affairs, but after losing a match to Batley ninjas they soon realised that rounders and chatting about different vibrator heads wasn't for them and they quickly regrouped and refocused on the rugby. Wensleydale will find it tough coming from artic conditions and into the Mediterranean heat of Leeds. No wind assisted kicks, no icy slide ins for tries in tropical Leeds. The cheesemen will think they are on holiday with the sun baking, a new great looking fence, Staropramen and Madri on the tap and hot tub full of Miggys finest women! This will all be too much for the cheesemen as they'll want to party with me rather play a game of rugby in the heat of 18 degrees.

North Ribblesdale to win.
Sounds like a place where they'd film 'where the heart is' one of those places no one wants to go, one of those places that's really boring, one of those places where they drink beer with their little finger protruding, whilst nibbling on a scone. Im guessing it's one of those places no one wants to visit unless your a big museum fan, so Old Grovians are gonna want to get out of there quickly.

Thorne to win. This is my banker. Team from Donny deffo gonna be a full team of Turkish barber skin fades with tin tin fringes and all carrying imaginary carpets and all competing for the best tats. Most teams will have suffered during lockdown, but Donny being the capital of STDs will have benefited, no going out and getting STDs means a fully fit STD free squad, meaning the boys can hold onto each other blue stilton in the scrum for extra grip knowing they won't get a wart on their hands. Thorne deffo banker. Of Wheatley hills are to keep it respectable they need realise that if the Thorne boys put their arms by their side it's man v man, not man v hulk.

Wetherby to win. When you have a win bonus of fish and chips with extra scraps how can you lose? Tartar sauce needs to be offered if the boys from Rotherham are to cause an upset. Money talks and the rich and powerful win over the poverty stricken Rotherham boys. A night at Tivoli's and grab granny for the Rotherham boys 2moz.

Ripon to win easy. Reckon Yarnbury are going to be 'the only way is essex' team of Yorkshire 2. Pretty boy good looks, talking about relationship problems in the changing room, stressing whether Susan will prefer you in red or navy blue or should you just go full on tartan. Deffo these boys are gonna be talking about Samantha's affair with Charlie rather than talking tactics. Sauvignon blanc or Chardonnay will be  the talk at halftime, whist the girlfriends pose for selfies with lips pouting. Yarnbury to be the whipping boys this year, but I'm looking forward to an away day here. You'll spot me hiding behind a tree, with a full on Sheffield steelers goalkeeper outfit on, shorts pulled down perving on the women! Just hope I make it into a wine bar after.

Keighley to win. Will Hull turn up? Or will a trip to civilization exiting a city twinned with Beruit be too much for them to handle?


Offline Alf Hart

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Re: Week 2 Predictions/Banter
« Reply #6 on: September 10, 2021, 08:44:44 PM »
Wotwit

What ?

You been at the wackicracky ?

Offline Locked Out

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Re: Week 2 Predictions/Banter
« Reply #7 on: September 10, 2021, 09:08:24 PM »
Weirdo, thank you so much much for setting the bar for pre match drivel. I doubt even Alfie Moon can compete, but it’s refreshing to have a different perspective on the matches. Let’s see where the predictions get us and you continue to grace the forum with your eloquent shiny wit.
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Offline KLY-LAD

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Re: Week 2 Predictions/Banter
« Reply #8 on: September 11, 2021, 10:03:38 AM »
Baildon -7
Leeds Corinthians -7
North Ribblesdale -7
Wheatley Hills +7
Wetherby +7
Ripon -7
Keighley +7

Offline Ribb Exile in Lancs

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Re: Week 2 Predictions/Banter
« Reply #9 on: September 11, 2021, 12:12:29 PM »
Totally misjudged Ribb's home Settle, Weirdo. More likely to be washing down fish n chips with a pint of bitter, lager drinking frowned on. Plenty of tourists. Thinking of setting up a sheep shearing museum. (Yes I said shearing)
Good luck for the season.

Offline Ribb Exile in Lancs

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Re: Week 2 Predictions/Banter
« Reply #10 on: September 11, 2021, 06:04:06 PM »
Baildon v Northallerton (27-31))
Leeds Corinthians v Wensleydale (35-30)
North Ribblesdale v Old Grovians (15-19)
Thornensians v Wheatley Hills (0-29)
Wetherby v Wath Upon Dearne (24-18)
Yarnbury v Ripon (36-17)
Keighley v Hullensians ((30-14)
« Last Edit: September 11, 2021, 06:12:31 PM by Ribb Exile in Lancs »

Offline Ribbflagman

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Re: Week 2 Predictions/Banter
« Reply #11 on: September 11, 2021, 06:23:26 PM »
sincere apologies but this is what I would have predicted.
Baildon-7
Wensley-7
Ribb-7
Hills+7
Weth-7
Yawn-7
Keighley+7

I thought I had posted but not pressed the button. Feel free to count it as you like but its the truth.
Good luck to all.
Flaggy.

Offline Weirdowetwipe

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Re: Week 2 Predictions/Banter
« Reply #12 on: September 11, 2021, 09:23:23 PM »
Well looking at the results today it looks like my motivational insults to opposing teams fired them up! Choir boys sneaking a win over the bad boy chiller crew, reports suggest crowd trouble as the cops were assisting boys were resisting after the match. Only way is Essex impressing their sexy ladies, bagging themselves a guaranteed 5 minutes ball tickling experience, whilst discussing why Jason's pecs have more defined shape then Brian's.

Thornesians were a big let down on my betting coupon today, haunted me of the days I used to waste thousands on CSKA Moscow men's basketball team, India's under 19s cricket team and sexy U.S.A women slalom skiers. Wheatley Hill must have penetrated the gaps between torso and arms where the Thorne boys were carrying their imaginary carpets.

Anyway I managed to get to the game of the week. Leeds Corinthinthians versus Wensleydale. I arrived in glorious sunshine thinking I was in Santorini as I walked past the sexy sassy women of Miggy. Kids playing in the sunshine, players wives having a good old chin wag and the Corinthian 606 death squad looked as handy as usual fully mob handed for the season opener. As the teams walked out I couldn't help but put my hand down my panties to check that I had some pubic hair as I thought I'd travelled back in time as the Wensleydale hair styles reminded me of the days I used to sit next to mummy sticking my panini 1986 Mexico world cup stickers in my album. As I rustled around my panties it was quite clear I had a full bush of thick black wired pubic hair which made me realise that covid had probably put an end to barbers in an around Wensleydale. For any budding entrepreneurs it doesn't take a rocket scientist to realise you'll make a fortune setting up a Turkish barbers in Wensleydale.

I didn't actually watch much of the game as I was engrossed with the cleavage on show on the sidelines and the staropramen just made those boobies look bigger and better. From what I saw of the game it was great kicking contest between Yoda and an Ewok with Yoda having the last say with a wonderfully taken drop goal to seal the points at the end for the Corinthians.

I'm intrigued for a night out in Wensleydale, 6 mullet hair Do's, 2 side parting with quiffs at the front, 3 sets of gelled curtains and perm on show today. Cowboy shoes, colonel Mustard pin stripe suits and shoulder pads on show. I must have a night out in Wensleydale as women will be flocking round me all juiced up while I strut around in a pair Nike air Max 270s.

Finally special mention to the ground staff gardeners at Corinthians. What lovely well cut lush green pitches you've produced. I'd have give you 10 out of 10 but noticed you just cut around the picnic tables leaving them a little over grown? It reminded me of some sexy German lady on the beach with silky smooth legs but spiders legs hanging out of her bikini!!!!

Offline Alf Hart

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Re: Week 2 Predictions/Banter
« Reply #13 on: September 12, 2021, 08:25:38 AM »
Wotwap

I detect a dark Freudian undercurrent to your ramblings young un ..managing to sexualise the pitch conditions is either impressive … or more likely,  as your name implies … wierd ! Whatever you’re an entertaining cove .. (sometimes) .. 

Offline Locked Out

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Re: Week 2 Predictions/Banter
« Reply #14 on: September 16, 2021, 09:48:56 PM »
Ok folks and now the moment you have all been waiting for - scores on the doors:

Locked Out = 9 for predictions and 1 for banter = 10
Rugby King = 7 for predictions, 5 for start up bonus = 12
ABR = 10 for predictions, 5 for start up = 15
Ribbex = 7 for predictions, 5 for start up = 12
WWW = WTF was that all about? = 10
K- Lad= 9 for predictions, 5 for start up = 14
Flaggy = 9 for predictions, 5 for start up = 14

Scoring:

3 = exact score
2 = correct points difference - +/- 7
1 = correct result
1 = entertaining banter

Table:
ABR 15
Klad 14
Flaggy 14 - no more late entries :)
Ribbex 12
RK 10
Locked 10
Dr 10 (out of charity)
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